October 23, 2017 Evie 0Comment

Q. Is it right for a hostess of a family get-together at Christmas to refuse to allow a girl who is a friend of a family member to attend?

A. When you’re a guest in someone else’s house or at someone else’s event, unfortunately, you really can’t just invite your own guests.

It’s the responsibility of the host to make a guest list, and there are lots of factors they might consider:

  • The physical space they have in their home (there are only so many chairs you can fit around a table, right?)
  • Their budget for hosting (more people = more expense)
  • The amount of chaos they can tolerate (we all know big groups can get a bit crazy)
  • The relationships of the individuals attending (no one wants drama at their party!)
  • The mood of the event (is this a close family gathering or a more casual grouping?)

Because we’re talking about a Christmas party, your hostess might want to keep the group smaller and more focused on the family. Consider that if you bring a friend (even a close friend), your hostess might feel like she has to offer others the opportunity to do the same, and then you’re not looking at a close family gathering at all!

With family, it’s fine to ask your hostess whether you can bring a friend, but:

  1. they are well within their rights to say no;
  2. you really can’t be upset about this.

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